Ask Ava: A Virgin's Guide to the Wedge/Ramp Combo

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Asked by you, answered by Ava

Everyone’s love life deserves a second opinion. Ava is here to answer questions about Liberator products, your sex life, or sex in general. Curious about the best sex positions for a bad back? Wondering how to fit your playtime into a busy schedule? Trying to find the perfect toy to surprise your spouse with? Ava is here to help. Email your question to askava@liberator.com.  And don’t worry—your secret is safe with her. We will not reveal your name or contact information at any point. So ask away! No question is too small or too far out! _______________________________________ My fiance and I are getting married this June and leaving for our honeymoon cruise shortly after the reception. Because she's a virgin, I want to give her the best possible, mind-blowing experience when we have sex for the first time and her cherry gets popped. She's not comfortable with using toys of any kind for the time being but would consider it later down the road. I purchased the Liberator Black Label Wedge/Ramp Combo with wrist and ankle cuffs set to help spice things up a little. And she's okay with that considering that she suffers from a medical condition called Dystonia. The physical effects are the cramping of muscles in her legs, feet, and her right arm and hand, which may make it hard for her being tied up. For a more kinky experience, she is open to having me put my fingers in her butt. I know it's necessary to take time with her and get her body relaxed and revved up before having sex. Are there any tips, tricks or other advice you could give both of us, along with any recommendations that would make this a great experience whether she's on top or bottom? Any recommended positions and/or moves that would be best with our Liberator Black Label Wedge/Ramp Combo with or without the wrist and ankle cuffs set? Any recommended lubricants too? I've done research online but don't always believe the things I'm reading because of conflicting information. Wow! When you dive into the pool you go straight for the deep end! Luckily, it sounds like your bride will not be swimming with sharks because you are making such an effort to make everything special. We just want to make sure you don't jump the shark, either. Anyone's first time is going to be a big deal. And certainly, on her wedding night, the pressure might overwhelm what is important—experiencing your love and expressing it physically. Honestly, you don't need a lot of tricks to make your wedding night meaningful. My well-meaning, but clumsy, high school boyfriend certainly didn't have any (sorry, Matt!) and it was still an overwhelmingly positive experience. If you really think back to your first time, it all just seems like a lot of building up. Society places such high expectations on virginity and then losing it. But really, this is the first of a lifetime of experiences you both will be sharing together. All of your planning shows how dedicated and thoughtful you are. With so much preparation going into her first time, don't get bogged down by the details. You have your entire lives to get kinky with it! The focus should be on making her feel comfortable and loved at first.

Lube Early, Lube Often

Lube is essential to having great sex. Women need a lot of warm up time and having lube can help get her start feeling good without feeling worried about responding. My favorite lube is überlube because it is very silky. You don't need a lot of the product either. I hate it when you have too much lube and things slip and slide where you don't want them. With this stuff, just a little drop will do. Also, a great choice is Aloe Cadabra. It has a more natural texture and it's organic.  You will not be introducing untested chemicals into her delicate ecosystem.

Wedge Ramp Combo Position Guide

As far as positions with your Wedge/Ramp Combo is concerned, I would save the cuffs for another special night. Instead, focus on lifting and tilting of her pelvis and offering her more intense sensations. Keep that in mind as you progress and take it slow.

Here are a few positions that will take it easy on both of you:

I love this position because it lets me relax and focus on the feeling. It also frees up your hands and you don't have to prop yourself up, which ultimately make you feel relaxed too. Put your hands to good use by gently massaging her clit. When she's feeling more comfortable, you can add a toy. Doggy is going to be phenomenal for her—as long as you keep her torso elevated. She can put all her weight down and not have to strain to keep herself up. You get to control your movements and last longer. I find doggy more stimulating than missionary. So, be sure she knows that you are listening and responding to what she wants to keep her relaxed. This position is really nice because of the sexy eye contact. She gets to control the pace and depth, while you get a first class ticket to one hell of a show. Her being on top is going to put pressure on her legs. So, place the Wedge under your knees and press downward on it to lift up your hips. Just like a fulcrum point, when they go down, your pelvis will lift up. This will help take some burden off her thighs. Once you guys are feeling ready, take any of these positions and kick up the kink by attaching cuffs to either wrists or ankles. That's the best thing about the Black Label Wedge/Ramp Combo—you've got options. This cuffed position is simple. It will elevate her hips and give you easy access. With her head supported by the Wedge, you can both languish in the lovemaking for hours. You crazy kids are going to have a night you will always remember, even without cuffs. Sex is a lot like language and you guys are going to be learning the alphabet for a while. Just remember, enjoy yourself and don't put too much pressure on the first time being a night of mind-blowing sex. Have fun, and in no time you'll be fluent in the language of love.