From bachelor/ette parties to Valentine’s and Groundhog Day to the first Wednesday of every month, there are plenty of occasions where gifting a sex toy is the most appropriate course of action. Though the decision to make your present orgasmic may be obvious, the specifics are often a little less so.
From the mental to the physical to the “huh, I never thought of that!”, there are quite a few variables that go into picking the perfect toy. Rather than slap a bow on some random dildo, you should consider the recipient and what matters most to them (and their naughty bits).
Taste in Toy Type
Most adults have figured out what part of their body delivers the most pleasure, and while they may still play around with other erogenous zones, will likely stay true to their favored hot spot (and methods of stimulating it) for the majority of their solo play. Why would you waste $200 on a stellar wand massager when your bestie is more into anal anyhow? Go with what you know they’re into, not what you hope they will be.
When in doubt, just ask. You can be coy about it and still have your gift be a surprise- just bring it up in casual convo over drinks or w/e. If you’re close enough to gift a sex toy, you’re close enough to discuss which ones make them the happiest.
Experience Level & Sensitivity
Now's the time to ask yourself whether your friend is more of a Charlotte or a Samantha.
Size
Sex toys are definitely not a one-size-fits-all item; what delights a size queen or king could traumatize a newbie masturbator or those with smaller holes. Many toys fall somewhere in the middle ground, but be sure to check the specs before checking out. If you’re gifting something insertable, it’s important to consider how a toy’s length and girth will be received when it’s, well… received.
Complexity
Those who keep their ever-growing toy collection in a giant treasure chest are unlikely to be intimidated by a toy with ten setting buttons; in fact, they’ll probably be excited to figure it out like an X-rated Rubix cube. A beginner, however, will appreciate something simple in function that doesn’t require an instruction manual to get the hang of.
Intensity
Some people can come at the touch of a finger (not literally, but can you imagine?!), while others require sky-high vibrations to get there. There’s nothing wrong with either party; we’re just all wired differently! However, the distinction is an important one to make. If you’re pal or partner falls on either extreme of the spectrum, toy power will matter a LOT. Vibes with a crazy strong base level are fab for those with greedy genitals but can actually be painful for people with super sensitive junk. Contrastly, toys with a milder setting range are perfect for the hypersensitive crowd but may leave big-buzz lovers unsatisfied and disappointed.
Aesthetic Preferences
Looks make more of a difference than you may think when it comes to gifting toys, and, as always, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
Realism
Is your pal the type who wants to fully immerse themselves in a masturbation fantasy and mimic the experience of playing with a lover? If so, realistic masturbation aids like veiny, flesh-colored dildos and strokers with vulva designs are sure to be a huge turn-on. If your friend is known to take things very literally, however, they might find disembodied parts a little too “Frankenstein” for their liking and prefer a more tactful design. If you’re not sure which camp your gift recipient falls under, choosing a toy that looks like a toy (and nothing else!) is the safest way to go.
Design
While being pretty isn’t the main appeal of sex toys, a stunning design can make the masturbation experience feel extra special. There’s nothing like watching yourself thrust a dildo that matches your manicure or opening up your toy drawer to find it filled with your favorite colors; we’re visual creatures, after all. Think about the clothes your gift recipient wears and what type of home decor they gravitate towards to get a sense of their style and try to match that in a toy design. From sleek, monochrome vibes that will make minimalists gush to pink bejeweled butt plugs for your favorite glam diva, there’s something out there for everyone! Yes, even your little sibling who is super into the rave scene.
The biggest thing to take away from these factors is that gifting a sex toy should be ALL about the recipient and never the giver, so be sure to take yourself out of the equation. Maybe you’re drawn to dildos, so that’s your first pick, but do they like dildos? Perhaps you think it’d be super hot to watch your partner use anal beads, but is that something they want? If you get to enjoy the gift, that’s a bonus, but not the main goal. The best presents are selfless, and in that regard, sex toys are no different than a birthday cake or beautiful bouquet.
