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Beyond the Drawer: If Your Sex Toys Could Talk

Featuring the b-Vibe Snug Plug I

Lilah rubbed me with soap from my bottom to my top. She was always careful to keep the water warm, never hot. She grabbed a towel and patted me dry. I was exhausted from the night’s adventures and ready to retire for the evening. I awaited my gentle kiss from Lilah that she always gave before tucking me in. But just as her lips were about to touch my silicone skin, Misha came up from behind.

“I think you’re ready for an Intermediate.” she said.

“I think you may be right.” said Lilah. They both laughed.

Intermediate. The word sent chills throughout me.

Misha brought Lilah into my life and now she was trying to push me out of the picture for something bigger. Was I about to lose her forever?

Three months earlier, Misha gifted me to Lilah as a surprise. When Lilah first saw me, I could tell by her wide eyes she was a bit nervous.

“Oh my god.” she said, holding me in front of her now flushed face. At first I thought it was because of my color. As she held me I noticed her room was far from my girlish pink, covered in dark, muted patterns. Though as Lilah went on, I realized it wasn’t my hue.

“I know how much you like my ass, Misha, but I don’t know if this will fit!” Misha reassured Lilah that not only was I going to be the perfect fit for her sweet, dainty asshole, I was also going to become her new best friend.  

Misha was indeed correct.

Over the next three months, I grew to know Lilah very well. Once or twice a week, I’d hear her doorbell from my spot in her top drawer. It was cool in my storage case, even next to her winter socks, but that bell would summon a fire inside me. Misha was the only one who would ring the bell. And despite wanting Lilah all to myself, it was Misha, afterall, who would bring the two of us together. I’d hear their giggles, their excitement. Oh, if only I could see it! Their pleasantries teased me as I waited for my entrance.

Once they clumsily entered Lilah’s room, a drink or two later, it wouldn’t be long until that drawer opened. Misha would start to say things like, “Please, I can’t take it.” or “Let me fill you up some more.” That was my cue.

The first few times I entered Lilah were excruciatingly slow journeys. But I didn’t mind. This gave me time to soak in her smells, her textures, her tastes. I’d hate that I was covered in sweet, cherry-flavored lube. Didn’t they realize how sweet Lilah already tasted?!

Our honeymoon phase was unforgettable. Don’t get me wrong, every time inside Lilah was, is, memorable. But to go back to those ‘good ole days’ would be nothing short of a miracle.  

As Lilah and I got to know each other better, the need to cover me in lube became less and less. Misha loved that. “You’ve done the work for me, sweet girl!” she’d say. Lilah was now relaxed with me snug inside her. She trusted me.

And now it was this trust that was going to be my downfall. How unfair. How cruel. How…

The drawer closed. I never did get my kiss and who knew if I’d ever get one again. My sweet Lilah was a beginner no more.

if your sex toys could talk

Carolyn Busa is a comedian and writer based in Brooklyn, NY. She has opened for Demetri Martin, been featured on SheKnows and appeared on Good Day New York. Her comedy is a reflection of her newfound confidence in herself, her style, and most importantly, her sexuality. Carolyn blogs weekly for My Sex Project.

 
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