It just popped into my head. You know, one of those unbidden random thoughts you get in the shower: I've been happily and faithfully married for... like, forever. I still find my wife totally sexy. And in some ways, I still make love like I did in high school (when we met). No, it's not like we haven't both learned a lot, done more "things," used every room in every position, tried some toys and what have you, but I'm talking about The Sequence. You know, start with some kissing, go for the boobs and then on to the crotch. Is this some kind of unwritten law or is it in the old testament or the Bhagavad Gita? Always the same old same old. So, I wondered, is it time for a change?
I admit to being a chicken. Too chicken to just go ahead and try it because I couldn't bear the thought of the hearing dreaded "what are you doing?" Admit it, guys, you've heard it. You're on a date and put on your moves and she says, "What are you doing?" Like they don't know? Of course you're not allowed to say, "Hey, I really want some..." or "Aiming for the next plateau." No, you have do the "I really like you and just want to show it so..." or some lame crap like that.
Well, we're not teenagers in Dad's Chevy anymore., dammit! After XXX years, we sensitive guys (hah!) have learned the value of "open and honest communication." (Good thing I sat through that Dr. Phil show.) So I came right out and asked her, "what if I...". The initial response was expected. "Well, you know, we women (not "me," it was "we women" like they actually resolved the issue over lattes) need to get, you know, warmed up (i.e wet)" So I thought, OK, I asked. No harm, no foul. But then, to my complete amazement she said, "Well, maybe under the right circumstances..." Alright! But as the excitement faded I had to wonder if I was really better off now. Because who knows what "the right circumstances" might be? And heaven help you if YOU think the circumstances are right and she doesn't. Because, as sure as you're not a little kid any more, you're gonna hear, "What are you doing???"